Another God moment in our life

For a brief second I must admit that I did not want to share what I am about to. Pride. That is the culprit behind my hesitation. Love is the reason I must share.

As you probably know, Jesse and I made a decision in Nov of last year that we were and are certain was what God was very clearly telling us to do. I resigned from Broad Street Ministry Center. We did not understand, we just knew I had to be obedient. Jesse and I knew that this was going to cause some big waves in our life. We knew that we would struggle financially. We knew that we would lose relationships that we valued. We also knew that there would be internal struggles for us because we both would have to learn to do things that did not come naturally. For me - I am a leader and I would have to learn to follow. Jesse is learning to lead us - to confess, I had stolen that role from him even before we got married.

Anyway, just as we had expected, financially we are struggling. For the past four months we have not known how we would pay our mortgage payment. We have trusted that God would give us opportunity to make the money we need or He would provide it. Last month, in an attempt to have money to pay our bills, we sold my car. My car was paid for and we sold it for $10,000. We bought another car the week after. We were able to pay some bills. Great! Our plan worked! Well -so we thought. That is until the transmission went out in the car we bought. We took it to a shop and got an estimate on rebuilding the transmission - $3800. Wow! My brother owns an auto shop in Waynesboro so we asked him what he could do. He can order a used transmission with a year warranty for $1800. Wow! That is great news - except for the fact that we don't have $1800. So....

So nothing. We made the decision to trust God. Now, I will tell you we are very frustrated about the car. Please don't think we got the news and began skipping around our living room. Not so. But there is nothing we can do. We knew that we would have to wait on God to give us an opportunity to make some money to get it repaired.

So yesterday, I got a phone call. Please bare with me - this IS going somewhere. Abram and I were watching Barney when my phone rang. Usually if I don't know your number - I don't answer. Yesterday I did answer.

On the phone was a man that I have never seen before. He sells insurance. I talked with him a few months ago about getting health insurance. Once I found out we were pregnant - we also found out that makes us un-insurable. Needless to say - I didn't really call this guy back - I figured we would call him later- after the baby is born.

The man - who I will not name - said that during his prayer time God brought me and Jesse to his mind and we were on his heart. He then (after repeatedly apologizing for the "weirdness" of the call) told me that he needed to send us something. He did not say what - he just graciously asked for my mailing address.

So now I am curious. If you know me well - you know that I already LOVE checking the mail. Jesse knows that is my job. :) Needless to say - I was very anxious to check the mail today.

Today I go to the mailbox. . . anxiously awaiting what the call I got yesterday was about.

I pull out a letter that said, 'During my prayer time God brought you and your family to my heart, I do not understand but I don't have to. I just have to be obedient."

Inside the letter was a check. I looked at what was first glance $25. Then I noticed that it had many more zeros. Someone - that I have never seen, only spoken with about health insurance three months ago, gave our family $2500.

I am so amazed at how God always provides for our family. I should not be so amazed all the time but I am in constant awe. Who are we that God considers us?!

It is amazing how many times I have witnessed God bless us for being obedient. I admit to you that being obedient has been difficult at times. I know we made the right move in our life. I know that we obeyed God. It feels good to be loved by the One who knows all.

I will say that I notice a beautiful dance in our life... God calls us to a place of obedience then shows us His faithfulness as He calls others to obedience. Beautiful.

Please be encouraged by this message. Know that what you are in right now, God is too. He is not far, He is near to His children. Where you lack, He never does. Where you walk, He has planned the path. Be faithful to trust Him.

Zephaniah 3:17 reminds us of how He sings over us... I hear that today. I feel the warmth that comes from a Father's voice singing in my ear.

I love you and it is a joy to share with you about the Lord and His faithfulness.

Honey Flows

Tonight my mother in law reminded me that I have not updated my blog lately. How sad that is because it is not like I do not have a ton of things to say. I read my last blog before writing this and realized that I have not been faithful to share about the sweetness of God.

In my last blog I asked that you, my friend, would pray for us. We are pregnant. We have SC Medicaid and could not find a doctor. We really wanted a Christian man to deliver our baby. To be completely honest, we wanted the same doctor that delivered Abram to deliver our second son or daughter.

I called over 35 doctors in the Augusta area. We also want to deliver at Doctors Hospital. We had such a great experience last time at Doctors. to make a long story short - we only found one doctor who would take SC Medicaid and delivered at a hospital in Augusta. So I called around to check references on this doctor and was told NO WAY. I was told that I should drive to Aiken rather than see this doctor. So now what! Talk about frustrating! So to be honest, for about a week I worried. I thought what am I going to do. I made an appt with the doctor with the bad reputation just so I could at least see a doctor and confirm what my body was 100% sure of already.

Finally God gave sweet peace. You know that peace that He describes as a peace that surpasses our own understanding... that peace. So one morning I was praying and this was my prayer,

"God, you know we need a miracle. We are trusting you. You know our situation. You know this baby. This is your baby Father. We are asking you for a miracle. Maybe that means you will provide the money we need to pay Dr Byars. Maybe that means you will send us a doctor that is honorable and takes our insurance. Or maybe you will deliver this good baby through the a doctor with a bad reputation. We don't know how - but we trust you God."

I kid you not - within two hours... TWO HOURS... my phone rang. The weekend before (this was a Monday) I was sick. I threw up probably 20 times in one day so I called Dr Byars office. I got the on call doctor and she talked me through some things. The phone call that I got was from Dr Byars office. I assumed that he was calling to check on me. He heard I was sick and you know, just checking on me. Yes, he did that. He also asked me if Jesse and I found a doctor. I told him not really but that I kept the appt with the doc with the bad rep. I simply told him that we were just trusting God with this baby. So he proceeded to tell me that God had "been on him" since we last talked. He told me that sometimes God speaks and we hear it but we don't listen. He said that God had to thump him pretty hard sometimes. He then asked me if Jesse and I would consider letting him be our doctor through this pregnancy - wait - for FREE.

Now breath and rub the chill bumps.. :).... What could I say? I said, "Are you kidding me?!" I was speechless. Of course I regained control of myself and said yes. I told Dr Byars about my prayer that morning and how God was using him in that moment to confirm HIS faithfulness to my family.

This is where the honey flows! How sweet is life knowing that you are a child of the Creator of all, A child of the King of all Kings, the everlasting Father! God has been so faithful to us. He has done immeasurably more than we could have hoped for.

I will tell you this too - there have been two months recently that we did not know how we would pay our mortgage payment... both times God provided in very unexpected ways. He is ALWAYS faithful.

Sometimes I think we forget who we are when we are His. Tonight Abram crawled in my arms and started to rock. Now, he does not let me rock him to sleep anymore. He would rather play. But tonight He climbed into my arms and let me know He needed me. More than that - He wanted me to sing over Him. I can not tell you how much God spoke while I rocked, sang to, and prayed over my son tonight. I love him an amount that I myself can not comprehend. How much more then does my heavenly Father love me - His daughter. When was the last time I let the Lord quiet me with His love? When was the last time I crawled into my Father's arms and relished in the fact that HE SINGS OVER ME.

^{Zephaniah 3:17}

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing."

Tonight, my friend. Tonight, I let the Lord quiet me. I sat as the Lord sang over me - His daughter. What fullness, what joy!

I will tell you that life is not all peachy right now either. We struggle. Everything is different for us. Money is tight. The stores are not doing their best which is stressful. I am pregnant - sleepy all the time, nauseated most of the time, and my heart is burdened for my daddy who still has liver, lung, colon, and skin cancer. I struggle with surrender and submission. Life is still life... one thing after another. But God is still God... one day for all days. He is so faithful - how can I not sit in His arms and be quieted by His love?

Tonight when I prayed for our children I asked God for only good things for them. I prayed that all that they do in all their days be for His glory and His renown. If that is my prayer for my children, my greatest desire for them is good... Then what of the Father's desire for me, for my family, my friends, my sweet daddy who is probably awake right now thinking about tomorrow. He desires good for us. He is a good, HOLY Father.

I am so glad that tonight Abram crawled in my lap. I started to write this blog earlier until Abram crawled onto the sofa and mingled between me and the laptop. He needed and wanted his mommy. I needed that. I needed to love him tonight and I needed to love HIM tonight. I needed to hear God speak and He did just that.

Keep praying for us. We heard the baby's heart beat today. Amazing. It's just that simple and so complex. Today our baby is about is about the size of a lime. He or she is able to open and close his/her little hands. We are 13 weeks today. You can go to www.babycenter.com and check out the development of our baby by week.

Also, pray for my daddy. He is starting to get depressed. Life is so different for him right now. I have never known a day when my daddy didn't work - when he didn't want to work. Now he can't work. He just finished 6 months of chemo. The chemo did not shrink his colon cancer any so on June 22 he will have part of his colon removed. Pray for his health, his spirit, his doctors, and his recovery. Pray for my sweet momma. She is anxious. She does not know life without my daddy. They married when she was only 14 years old. Pray for strength for her, for her heart, and pray for some Godly women to come along side of her and simply be there for her.

You can also pray for Jesse. He is working with Meybohm Realty now. Pray that he will have confidence, motivation, and that God will bless his career.

Pray for me that I will keep learning to surrender and to let my husband lead our family. Pray that God will keep me and "Baby E-Dos" (baby E #2) safe through this pregnancy.

Thanks for being a friend.. and obviously a reader.

Love you!